I had something worse than anxiety attack. I relived a moment in my mind that scarred me bad. Its so fucked I'm just leave it to a therapist. But lets just say I wanted everything gone man even while being chilled out and calm. I'm fine tho I made it in the end. Now I just wanna get so high I pass out but have to work today and tell myself to keep talking less and less by the day. Good day people hope you're fine.
Burnt myself today. I was cooking and trying to make sure i ate something since i kinda felt like i was in a funk today and almost just didn't leave bed all day (still kinda didn't but at least i tried...) Didn't get flashbacks and have a meltdown. Usually on bad days if i slip up, it fucks me up to the point that i can't eat or function or do anything til i'm done freaking out, and even then i'm kind of a shell of a human being. Good progress that I didn't realise til i thought about it. Fuck you PTSD, you'll be my bitch soon enough.
How do yall find your therapists? Just a Google search? Or did you get recommended them else where or how do you find a good one? Is there a site or app anyone has used that possibly helps you find them that works well? I'm not sure how to go about this I've haven't had a therapist since I was a kid but desperately need one.
Basically just google "therapist, psychiatrist, psychologist" see what pops up, kinda works the same way as finding a place to eat. Usually they have a website or a social media page with a quick description of whatever service they offer. If you can find one give them a call and see if you can set up an appointment. Sometimes they won't be taking new patients so you might have to call around. There's also online options but i haven't looked into them yet. BetterHelp | Professional Counseling With A Licensed Therapist
I just called this place I'd heard was really good and they put me on a waiting list. After about a couple months I finally got a call from this woman who then became my therapist. Then I got with a psychiatrist there. It was just a place my husband had recommended to me. But you can look around on Google of course. I hope you find a good one! They're out there even with all the bad ones. I hope you have good luck with it, lmk how it goes!!!
I Found Mine Through my Mama Who isa Nurse lol...LMK If you Find One Please I Worry about you My Friend. ~Toni~
I sat that motherfucker down at least two times. Goddamnit ... I could probably look through these goddamn posts and tell you within a day I told that motherfucker he's gonna die. That bitch is gonna kill you, and you'll let her. I told him.
Saw a shrink today and talked to her about how I feel like everyone wants to kill me (which they do...or do they?), about my broken family, dysfunctional relationship with my dad, being a 27 year old bitch who can't get laid, depression, my violent fantasies of revenge against ppl who cross me, and other shit i won't bore you with. Some of these are real issues you just gotta work through but i might also be bipolar with PTSD and schizoaffective disorder. Whoop de doo! Told her i smoke weed as self medication tho, oddly enough she says there's way worse shit i could do which is true. It's the context that matters. Smoking sporadically while working through your shit and taking action is one thing, smoking to escape without doing jack is another. Did way too much of the latter. For almost a decade. 18-27. Maybe i'll die at 27 like kurt cobain and a bunch of other famous people who knows
I've been diagnosed (formally) with a variety of mental problems... And I'm starting to wonder if maybe I should be tested for autism spectrum disorder. It's the one thing I always tried to deflect, but with the mental illnesses I'm diagnosed with (all are frequently co-morbid with autism), the fact I've got an autistic parent, a lot of peculiar childhood behavior. and that I have some (confirmed) genetic issues that are commonly co-diagnosed in autism... Yea, I think it's time I start at least considering it as a possibility. But, I also don't want to label myself as anything until I can get some actual testing done (because that's a really harmful thing to do to people who are confirmed to be suffering)... Which I can't get done right now because my therapist's is shut down. Ugh...
Having been diagnosed with autism at age 3 I can tell you since there is no cure most of the time you just feel hopeless and unlovable cuz of the odd behaviors. Some even will make it a joke. In public I always get funny looks due to my hand and eye stemming. Knowing I have autism hasn't really helped me much accept for give me an answer as to what I have. Hope you're surrounded by good people cuz it can make all the difference.
Are you oversensitive to sounds, touch and light? Do you have a hard time making eye contact? Are your conversations only on your topics? If so, you could be autistic. My wife's been treating autistic folk for decades , she's an occupational therapist . I'd recommend practicing coping skills and channeling your strengths . Try you tube, Dr joe dispanza , Lots of good tips to help strengthen your mind.
While I can't know what it feels like to go through the struggles you do daily (as you are diagnosed and I am not) I have been the butt of all autism/OCD jokes for eight years now despite having never been formerly diagnosed with the former, so I know that people can be jerks about it. Now I'm not the joke police, I don't mind a bit (or a lot) of humour here and there, but it seems like when people make mental illness/disability jokes they sometimes think said illnesses don't exist, whereas for jokes about physical illness or injury, people generally recognize that the image is a parody of a REAL thing. For example, nobody doubts that amputees exist because of amputee jokes, but mental illness jokes do lead some to question the existence of the very concept. I'm not saying that discourse shouldn't be promoted in the medical field (e.g. Is something we previously thought was one illness actually only a symptom of another illness, varying causes of illnesses, are our current treatments effective, are we over/under-treating etc...) but outright rejecting that anyone's brain is different is just plain unscientific. As for family, I have a wonderful mother who helped me through so many physical issues during early childhood. The main reason I can eat normally rather than being on a feeding tube or liquid diet, and can play sports (albeit requiring significantly more effort to reach a similar strength to my peers) rather than barely being able to walk is because she was simply too damned stubborn to give up on me. Hell, I didn't even know there was anything 'different' about me until midway through my childhood when I finally asked what my appointments were for. It wasn't that I wasn't in pain. It's just that she was that good at raising me 'normally' despite of it. Sorry for the essay, I ramble when I'm high. Feel free to delete if it's too long/the wrong place, etc... I'm new to these forums and don't fully grasp their etiquette yet.
This is the entire right place actually. Sometimes I wish I could recognize what's against me and what is not. However just know you and I and everyone here aren't alone and, we love hearing how we can all relate in some way. To me its means a whole lot when others are willing to share words to comfort. I hope anyone with any mental or physical disabilities feels welcome on @Papageorgio's wonderful thread. Thanks.
I may or may not be on the spectrum myself. Unsure as I have never been officially diagnosed. I relate to what you write because I got bullied terribly in high school and college. Bullying in high school was more overt, by the time college rolls around the bullying more takes the form of exclusion and social shunning which can fuck you up psychologically. I am (at least I hear, i have low opinion of myself anyway so i could care less) incredibly gifted in music, have been into it all my life, and sometimes people who are autistic are like that, a lot of their mental processing goes into one thing to the exclusion of a lot of other things. Do you have anything like that? But whether it's that or depression which I also have it can be a very hard place to be so, especially without a lot of support from family or friends, so I feel for you. Honestly what helps me is humility and realizing i'm not special and trying to have compassion, recognizing yourself in others and learning ways to relate to humanity. Then there's people who are just fucking assholes, and fuck those people
Got a good night's sleep last night so I feel more at peace than I did yesterday. Yesterday sucked. Lots of intrusive thoughts. Talked to my therapist and she helped. I found out it wasn't actual voices I was hearing, but intrusive thoughts that take me into delusions where I feel like I'm in two different realities, one where I am now and the other this fantasy world where I'm talking to people in Hollywood, having relationships with them, and stuff like that. Usually it doesn't bother me but lately it's been a lot of people in my other world ganging up on and bullying me. Triangulation, all of it. Today is ok so far tho. I'm taking another T break today, yesterday I smoked weed in the morning and didn't get hardly a thing. So today is off, but tomorrow, Mother's Day I will try again with the weed and see what happens. I hope everyone else is doing as well as you can. Hang tight, all! We can get through it.